Craftymama and I are in a different kind of relationship. Same sex couples aren't new, we aren't breaking new ground, we dont face the same kind of persecution and discrimination that those before us did. But - its still different. As a result of this both of us are noticing how the world is not only catered to the norm there are biases and beliefs that are so engrained in culutre that we dont even see them.
On a school form for the kids it asks for mother and father. Simple - who thinks anything of this? I sure didnt before. But now..we are mother and mother - so we often find ourselves crossing this off. Cableman and Glassman are involved with the kids of course - but not really with school. All school stuff is us. Now, we arent thinking it should say mother and mother, or that we should have different forms. But shouldnt it say parent 1 and parent 2?
I've also been doing reading on what it would take for Craftymama and I to have a baby together. Screw the actual getting pregnant and finding sperm business. But did you know that after Craftymama and I have the baby the one who didnt give birth (the non gestational parent) has to apply to adopt the baby. And with that process comes: homestudy's, letters of reference, job letters, criminal record checks, and a letter from the gestational parent stating why they want their partner/spouse to adopt their own child. Oh..and fees. Anywhere from $1200-$2500 I've seen. To adopt your own child. The NGP will have been there through everything, through the trials and tribulations of trying to get pregnant, pregnancy, and birth and still they have to pay to adopt their own kid. Two people can have a one night stand and the sperm donor would be more of a legal parent to their kid right off the bat. Its so annoying - and honestly, it makes me so angry. I shake with rage when I think about it. Its so unfair. One day it wont be like this. Just like before craftymama and I wouldnt have been able to get married - one day..same sex couples wont have to prove that they are worthy of parenting their own children.
Im still shy - tbh. Craftymama has joined this group on facebook that I had seen previously and wanted to join - but couldnt bring myself to do it. About 90% of people on my facebook still think Im with glassman. I wouldnt care if they knew I wasnt. I dont want them to think I was. Im not ashamed or embarassed of being with Craftymama either. Its...idk..I dont want the extra attention. I even like attention...Idk what it is..Maybe Im afraid of disappointing people. IDK..Id scream to the world about how much I love her..but why cant I stand up for our relationship on facebook?
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