Pregnancy Nesting

So craftymama is definitely nesting. She needs to knit all the things, and is already out of projects. On top of that is all the renovation projects. The only thing left on her original list is painting the stairs and upstairs landing. We have already painted the living room (I say we, but I really mean her), the boys' floor, finished the playroom, and I'm sure other things. So, with no immediate renovation project - as the stairs need to wait for the kids to be away, she found another one, and it's a doozy.

We are now turning what was the unused office/crap collector into a pantry. We have already moved the fridge in there, and craftymama is working on a layout that will contain counters, shelving and a whole host of other things I'd imagine. I am so excited about this project. I have wanted to turn that space into a pantry for the longest time but didn't think it was feasible. It only took craftymama suggesting it to turn it into a reality. Originally we were going to take down some walls but then we discovered that this space was an add on, and the wall we wanted to take down was the old exterior wall, so that's a no go unless we pay someone to do it - which we can't afford to do. I will post pictures of this progress when I have some.

I also need to post pictures of the playroom but Craftymama states it's not ready yet, it needs some pictures on the wall which will be quite cute.

The living room looks amazing, and I really need to post pictures of that change. It went from a blood red to a hazelnut cream white. The ceiling looks taller, the room is brighter, and it looks so much cleaner. It's amazing what a coat (or 6) of paint can do for a room. The red is dead as craftymama would say and it's a good thing.

We had a midwife appointment the other day, and it was great. She finally heard the heartbeat with her version of a fetoscope - as we aren't using a doppler, I've been hearing it off and on for a while now, though now I don't need to hold my breath to hear it. It's so much louder. Craftymama is measuring right on track at 25weeks, and all things look great and normal. Ziggy is growing and kicking all the time. I can't believe we are getting so close!

Being an Adult

Being an adult can be so hard sometimes, oh, who am I kidding, it's pretty much hard all the time.

We have reached a point where decisions need to be made that will greatly affect our future, and where we are and what we do. They are scary decisions that we don't at all feel qualified to make. Things don't always go the way you want them, and sometimes you make mistakes. Sometimes these mistakes are large, and they are hard to fix.

That's where we are now.

The kids are great. Our pregnancy goes well as well. We are 23 weeks now, and given Craftymama's track record we are probably about 15 weeks away from having our little Ziggy in our arms. We are slowly getting things prepared.

The living room is nearing completion in terms of paint - just one more coat, but the blood red is officially dead - to Craftymama's delight! It looks so much bigger and brighter - I am amazed at how much taller the ceiling looks now that it's this hazelnut cream colour.

We are planning on painting the stairs, the upstairs landing, and the boys' room in mid August. Cableman (who no longer works there but has an at home business), is going to take the boys over night to his parents house, and Glassman will have the girls so it'll just be Craftymama and myself - this will make it a lot easier to do and to paint. It will be a pain in the butt taking all the boys' crap out of their room though - there is a lot of it!

I have finals for my first set of classes next week, and then I am half done my foundation courses, I am praying and hoping I pass. More than that though - I am actually studying and doing my non required homework - something I never used to do. I am trying so hard to do well in these classes, I need to do well, I *have* to do well. But I know all I can do is my best, and so long as I am doing that I shouldn't be ashamed. I get my mark back for my Economics midterm today (hopefully) and I am so scared. My brain just does not compute economics well, even though I study every day (minus a day here or there) and I ask questions in class. The knowledge just does not want to sink in. But I did my best on that midterm, and all I am hoping for is a pass.

Drive By

• Craftymama is feeling Ziggy move all the time now, not just flops but actual kicks. I can't wait until it kicks me in the head. 
• We have our ultrasound this month to make sure all is going well, we still haven't determined if we are going to find out gender - but if we are, we need to get another ultrasound as this one is too early for them to tell us. 
• BigR may have the pox - so he isn't in school today, much to his chagrin. 
• I have started my Christmas knitting as I don't think I'll get much time to do it once Ziggy is here and I am in school. 
• My school start in 24 days - well, that's when orientation is, actual schooling doesn't start until July 3rd. 
• K is determined that she *will* have earrings for her birthday, this is all thanks to Craftymama's mama who sparked the idea in her pretty little red head - she now will not drop the topic. 
• My birthday was last week and it was probably my favourite one of them all - surrounded by love and family. I felt special but not focused on - it was wonderful. 
• My car is making weird sounds, the bathroom sink is broken, and the kitchen sink is leaking - I loathe being an adult sometimes. 
• LittleR's birthday is coming up (June 24th) and I still have no idea what to do for her. BigR's birthday is first (June 10th) but I know what we are doing for him. 
• With the table done and the playroom waiting for some aesthetic pieces, craftymama has turned her attention towards the living room (paint), the upstairs floor (paint) and the laundry room (I have no idea of her plans, they change depending on what she finds on pinterest).
• M is still going to a speech group and is doing really well, right now they are working on his S's, as in "snack" instead of "nack." He is actually speaking up in the group now and interacting with them, it's great to hear about his progress. 

Farmhouse Table

So this past weekend was a busy one. On Saturday, the main table making day, I took all the kids out for the day so Craftymama and Glassman could have some free time without the kids around making more chaos.

We left at 9:30a, after I had already gone grocery shopping, picked up Cableman and off we went. Our first stop was Oliver Woods. This is a natural wood themed playground in the middle of a forest like setting. It's an awesome playground. We had a snack, played, and found a geocache hidden way up high in a tree.

Next stop was Target, a new store that had just opened up. BigR got his first pair of lace up shoes, which still cause him much grief and anxiety though he insisted he wanted them and can, in fact, tie bows, and we also got some cute little things for Ziggy that the kids helped pick out.

Then it was coffee time for me :)

Then we were off for the highlight of the trip. It was a long drive out to Qualicum where we went to the beach and met my mom NanaJ. We found grabs, dug our toes in the sand and water, and found some shells to bring to my work to make soap in. Then it started to rain and we got quite wet. LittleR actually loved the rain and was dancing around in it - she went thigh deep into the ocean; soaking her self.

We went back to my mom's house and had hot dogs and hot chocolate - much to the kids' delight. Then we drove Cableman back home, and headed home ourselves. All in all being gone for seven hours.

When we got home, the table was built. That night the first and second coats of stain were applied, and the next day the bench was built. That was this past Sunday. Today the stain has dried, the poly has dried and we can have our first family dinner at this beautifully built farmhouse table.

Beautiful table and bench

This table is 8 feet long and will be able to seat 10!

Pretty stain

A bench to seat four children - as they were all fighting over who would get to sit on it. 

This is the table our kids will remember as they grow old. This is the table we will have our big Christmas dinners at. This table has been built to last, and last it will. It is my hope that after all the kids move out and start having kids of their own, that they will all come back home and we will continue to be a family at this table - but that's not happening for years to come. For now, we seat 6 at this table nightly.

Laundry Room and Meds

So, our washer crapped out. We used the tax refund to buy a washer (and fridge - cause that went too, and fix the van - cause that went on the same weekend ugh!). Washer delivered! Yay! Washer does not fit. We tried stacking it but that didn't work in the space either. So, what do we do? We widen the wall. Well, Craftymama and Glassman widen the wall - I went to pick up firewood and mowed the grass.

You can see the machines stacked here. This is the wall we are widening. 

It's lathe and plaster....

Which means a lot of mess

Add caption

Lathe and plaster removed

When they were taking off this top section, T saw it and thought  it was a treasure map - and was all excited, unfortunately it was not a map

The drywall went up as well, and after I crawled underneath the house to pull the dryer hose over to the vent (as that's what has to be done) we had working machines again. I can't tell you what it's like to not have working machines with 6 people in the house! Especially since Sunday is typically laundry day wherein I wash all the clothes ha ha ha. Now it needs to be taped, mudded, primed and painted. Then this wall is done - again.

I also wanted to touch on my comments from yesterday regarding the kids' school. I think a lot of my discontent with the school comes from my overall negative attitude as of late, which stems from me forgetting to take my medication. I hate being one of those people that needs it to stay stable, but evidently I am, and I need to accept that.

I don't hate the kids' school. I do prefer it, definitely, over public school. Maybe this is what all private schools are like - they require a lot of effort and time on the parts of the parents. Maybe it's hard for me to see all the good because by the time I get home the kids don't really want to talk about school any more. I don't know. I don't regret sending them to this school, I know in the long run it will be great, just sometimes my views get a little cloudy and that isn't helped by not taking my medication.

Building, School, Work

I haven't forgotten to do a spotlight on K, I just don't have any K pictures that accurately display her personality. We have made some more progress in the bedroom. The dresser has been painted, and brand new purple flower knobs have been added. Baseboard and quarter-round has been added around the room, and of course, you can also see the painted floor in these pictures.

Dresser in alcove with window. 

Painted floor and baseboards. 

purple flower knobs

We need to add crown molding and figure out how to get our stuff to hang up in the closet. We don't have a rod in there, and have put the bigger dresser in there for our clothing. This smaller dresser holds some clothing as well, but there are two of us and we have a lot of clothes. I also need to get a picture of the artwork Craftymama hung on the wall near our bed, it is full of sentiments of love and partnership. It's a wonderful creation.

I start school June 24th, well that's orientation. I am so excited and so nervous. Getting my masters degree is a big deal. I am proud of myself for being eligible to attend and to go, but worried I won't actually be able to do the course work both because its hard and because of everything else that is going on. I am going to have to take 8weeks off of work to do the foundation courses before the actual Masters starts in September. I'm nervous about leaving work for that long as well.

We are going to be going to Toronto again, hopefully, to the Treating Yourself Expo. And this year we are intending to have a booth to sell our products - especially our hemp stem teas and chocolates. We are expanding our business and getting great investments so shows like these are important for exposure. While I am going Craftymama and Glassman man will be building a farmhouse table, though I don't think that one exactly. I can't handle the chaos building that will bring so they decided to do it while I am on the other side of the country for a weekend.

Other projects include painting the living room, the stairs, and doing the playroom, all by the end of summer. It's a tall order, but since when do we do anything easily?

The Bedroom

Andrea finished the bed! (and painted the floor, though I have no pictures of it!). It took the both of us to get the big mattress upstairs - it's a king sized and a very narrow, low stair case. We pretty much had to bend the mattress in half and then push and pull it slowly and painstakingly up the stairs. But we did it!

We slept in the room for the first time last night, and it was so nice to look out the window and see trees, and actual things rather than a 6ft fence that we saw out of our downstairs bedroom window.

Of course the downstairs bedroom is quite a mess, and still has our clothes and things in it, but we are working on moving that all upstairs. There is no room for an actual dresser in the bedroom so we have a closet organizer and are going to some how get all of our clothes in that. I still don't know how we are accomplishing this.

All that's left to do is the closet, trim, a few touch up painting spots, and new light fixtures. It's all slowly coming together.

Reno Update

So our room upstairs is coming along. Soon we will have a playroom downstairs - and that in and of itself will be life changing. I wanted to give everyone some pictures to see the progress, even if no one cares/is reading I know one day I will like to look back on this and see how far we have come.

The new (old) door. Freshly painted. I love these paneled doors!

The room with the just installed bead board and wainscoting. 

The floor sander to sand the hardwood floor. Unfortunately, with another machine we ended up burning the floor (*sad face*) so now we have to paint it a dark brown-black. 

Painted wainscoting. The bed is going in this area. 

And a quick update on the kids. There was a chicken pox scare at the school, but none of our kids got it. We were invited to a pox party, and almost went, but certain circumstances made it impossible to go for us. We are hoping that they catch it at some point to get that natural immunity. R passed his grade 1 readiness test so he is ready to move on to grade 1 next year - yay! Also, T has been having some issues with his speech so he is seeing a speech therapist and we are using the Lidcombe program with him to help with his stutter and mispronunciation with words. Hopefully this all goes smoothly and he gets back on track. Also, K is going in for a hearing test; the health authority visited the kids' classes and she didn't register at a certain decibel level so they are just doing another one to make sure she is all right.  

Sleepy T

Sibling Love!

LittleR was proud of herself. This is "what takes bad guys to jail"

Craftymama and I have renewed our love of knitting together, and so now we spend our evenings knitting and watching Pretty Little Liars. Unfortunately, we are about to catch up to what is airing on TV (and we don't have cable so we watch it via 1Channel. We need a new show for when we catch up. We have already watched Lost and Prison Break (and omg they were awesome!). Any suggestions for shows we might like. Don't say 24 - it was awful!

Spring break starts in 2 weeks, so it will be nice for the kids to get a break from school, and Craftymama will get a break from making lunches ha ha ha. I, however, will still be working which means no break for me. I miss those breaks with the kids. Soon, with going back to School and working I am nervous about what time that will take away from the kids - I already don't see them as much as I want to. Or craftymama - I miss the time we used to have together (we used to spend all day together, or most of the day when I was working part time). There is so little time in the day.

Life continues with paint

The drywall is done, the mud is up and sanded and we are ready for paint. 

Craftymama doing something with corner something and mudding, 

Glassman drilling the electrical box in that Craftymama moved all on her own. 

These are the  colours we have narrowed it down to: a grey, yellow, green, or mauve. 

The yellow is out, and the green is all but out. But the mauve and grey are tied. The grey is an easy colour to have decor for, it is more of a neutral but will darken the room. The mauve is a harder colour to decorate to, but will definitely give the room a personality right off the bat. It's a hard decision. We had hoped to paint this weekend, but with the lack of colour choice it's going to have to wait. 

While they do the construction work the boys hang out with Cableman and have a picnic at the beach! 

I got to spend a night at my sisters house and get many baby snuggles for C. I even got to wrap him and he fell asleep on me! It felt good to wrap a baby again! 

All the things

The stomach flu hit us hard! First I got it, mildly, then the kids got it, then I got it again severely with Craftymama getting it as well. It was a week long puking fest - but luckily we seem to be on the mend now.

The drywall is completely done in our bedroom, and soon I won't be allowed in there. Craftymama wants to surprise me with a completely finished room. I hate surprises, but this one should be a good one. The platform bed needs to be built, the walls need to be painted, trim needs to go up, the floors need to be painted - so much to do! I want to be able to help her, but we all know how handy I am not.

We also want to paint the living room - for this she wants my help. I suck at taping and there is so much to tape in there, and goodness forgive me if I get paint on the original trim around everything. I'm hoping she tapes most of it, and then I can prime it. She is also going to show me how to prime properly, with patience, so that I don't have to do eight thousand coats. I am stingy when it comes to paint - it's cause I don't like to waste it and don't like to spill or splatter on anything - both of which I am known for.

The mud room, also known as the hole, is almost done as well. Shelves and bench have been built, the door has been painted, the walls are painted - to be honest I am not sure what's left other than trim. It seems every room in our house needs trim though - it is the finishing touch I suppose.

The kids are doing great in school. LittleR loves kindercottage and has transitioned beautifully to it. She is still getting used to playing with the other friends, but there have been no tears or complaints about going. R is gearing up for his class 1 readiness testing. In kindergarten they do a class 1 readiness test in which they look at the children's motor skills, drawings, and personality and decide if they are ready to move on past kindergarten. Now R is 6 so technically, in public school, he could be in grade 1 now, and would definitely be ready for grade 1 next year. However, I have some concerns about him. He lack certain coordination when it comes to skipping, which they look for. His drawings aren't quite at the level they want them to be at, and he still sometimes holds his crayons with a closed fist. I don't want to hold him back, but I want to do what's right for him, and if they determine he is not ready then Craftymama and I have some talking to do.

Craftymama and I have had some parenting discussions as of late. I have been stern, more stern than I need to be, with the kids, and not present with them when I am with them. I am not making excuses at all, but I know part of it has to do with the current depression I am battling. I am cycling through a down phase right now, and hoping it ends soon so I can get back to my normal self. I need to have opinions and actually care about things. I need to be present with my kids so as to create good memories with them, and most of all I need to find myself among all of this.

Work goes decently. I have been trying to have renewed motivation to complete my job and the tasks at hand, and slowly but surely they are getting done. I am getting some help tomorrow to help guide me in the right direction so I can start 2013 off on the right foot. My car is wonderful to have and I am thankful everyday for my boss who bought it for the company, but really bought it for me to use to get to and from work. The only downside is a side effect from my medication is extreme fatigue/exhaustion/drowsiness and I am certainly suffering from those. It makes driving and functioning at both work and home near impossible at times. I have a call into my doctor to help remedy this but for now I am living on whatever caffeine pills I can get my hands on, even though their effectiveness is waning.

C and my sister N are doing splendidly. She has hit a bit of a snag in her own mental health but is getting back on track. I love little miniC so much. It is so awesome to be able to see him grow and to know him in that way. I was super close, or at least I felt close to my sister E's oldest child who we will call BigM. I felt our relationship was special and she helped me through a lot of things. Though we aren't close now, due to distance, circumstance, and strained relationships, she will always hold a special place in my heart. It seems C and I are building that same relationship, I only hope we are not separated like BigM and I were.

Lastly, I want to touch on my weight. I have been running every other day, and I was working with a trainer but I simply cannot shed the extra weight I am carrying. I know that another side effect of my meds is weight gain and retention but there must be a way to combat that. I could probably due a workout on my off running days but then when would I have time to spend with Craftymama, and where would I find the energy when I am already exhausted from the day and my medication. It is frustrating to have been working hard for over a year with only weight gain instead of weight loss. I want to get down to where I was before my bipolar hit me hard - it's just feeling impossible lately.

Destruction and Rebuilding

This is what I managed to accomplish in an hour of ripping up the floor in our new room. It's laminate/asbestos flooring on top of original (painted) hardwood. 

This is what Glassman managed to accomplish in an hour. The whole floor is up. Oh what I wouldn't give for some upper body strength. 

This is what happens when I leave to get them food. They painted each other's faces with lipstick. 

The floor and insulation ready to go up. 

Insulation installed! Before there was just two layers of paneling separating the boys' room and this room. It made the rooms cold and not sound proof at all. Now it's changed. 

Now there is also drywall up along the above wall. We have to wait another two weeks before we can finish dry walling the room. I shouldn't lie - the floor, insulation and dry wall project has been a Glassman and Craftymama thing. I've been getting them food and watching the kids :)

And just to end off here is an adorable picture of Craftymama and M

LittleR

LittleR started school yesterday. We were a little nervous as she doesn't really like talking to new people. I took the morning off work so I could go with her, just like I did for all the other kids. We found her slippers and her chair and she got settled into colouring in her book with some tea right away. Yes, they serve tea to the kids - its decaf herbal tea, sometimes just warm apple cider. No screaming or uncertainty on her part. Craftymama and I watched through a little window outside for a couple of minutes and she seemed completely fine. When craftymama went to pick her up she was crawling around the dirt with a friend, and exclaimed that they made a boat, and had porridge, and she talked to people! She had a great time. I am so glad.

This means all the kids are in school now. R and K go from 8:15a-1:30p 5 days a week, M goes from 8:30a-12:30p 3 days a week, and LittleR goes from 8:30a-12:30p 2 days a week. Yes, that means craftymama has an hour to kill between pick up of a little kid and pick up of a big kid. I feel bad for her. It must be hard to entertain them for an hour every day.

Craftymama went and started the renos on the hole today. The hole is a room in the back off the kitchen. It was a mishmash of cupboards and a random counter top that made no sense. For some reasons, that being LittleR losing her gloves, she decided it was time to turn it into a mudroom so there was more organization for the kids' stuff. The cupboards and shelves came down, the stuff in them was put elsewhere (some sitting on a desk waiting for the playroom), and the random countertop had already been removed. She just can't wait to destroy things. She must have a weekday project and a separate weekend project on the go at all times.

Things with glassman are becoming more normal. The kids call him nearly every night and they see him as regularly as possible. K is still having trouble adjusting at bedtime and as a result the house isn't sleeping as soundly as it once did. She is up quite frequently. I still miss him, but I don't get as viscerally sad when he leaves.

:)

Glassman's room and a new light!

We are starting the renos on Glassman's old room. We are going to turn it into our room, and make our room a playroom. But before we can move, there are a lot of things that need to get done. These are the before pictures of the room

This is the view when you walk in, left side, this wall will be a built in platform bed. 

This is the view when you first enter the room, right side. The far wall will be a built in platform bed. 

The view from the platform bed area. This is a small alcove where we hope to put a small dresser. 

The view of the entrance door. Note the old tacky bifold closet doors. 

And finally! This is our new dining room light! It's centered in the room now, and gives it a much more modern feel. 

The renos are coming along nicely in our house. Already in Glassman's old room the ceiling panels have come off and the scraping is done. We are hoping to finish sanding, wash, and get them painted this weekend. Then the paneling will come down, the floors will come up, and a new wall will be built.

The fireplace in our room has also been painted, but I'll post pictures when the final coat is done on it. Lastly, the laundry room has gotten some beadboard, a primed ceiling and painted door, and a light fixture make over. Again, pictures when it is all completed - including a painted blue chevron ceiling.

Craftymama's love of power tools increases. For Christmas she got a drill and a jig saw; now she has her eyes on a kreg jig, mitre saw, and sawsall. Oh how she has changed from her knitting needles and sewing machines :)

Glassman, Money, Christmas

It's December 5th. Glassman still hasn't moved out. He gave us notice late so he technically stay for all of December, but he has made no effort to pack his things or made arrangements with his dad to move out. He wants to do it gradually, which I think will make it more difficult for the kids. He is planning to sleep at his dad's this weekend so we will see how that goes.

His staying also means that the room renos are on hold because we can't move rooms when he is still in one. It's frustrating but okay because....

We are broke as all hell. Between Christmas, and the roof, and the van, and a banking mistake we are having to dip into what little savings we have. This is so infuriating. I feel like we will never get ahead and never get out of this. I know we have to because we can't live like this for the rest of our lives, but I don't have any plans for how we can go about getting out of this. There must be a way though, there must be.

The kids are excited for advent. Every year we bring out the advent calendar and there is an activity that we do in each day. Yesterday, for example, we went to the library for  Christmas books, the day before - they made reindeer puppets. It's fun for them to look forward to something every day, rather than just looking forward to Christmas day. It takes some of the pressure off the day.

Speaking of Christmas Day. We have such a nice day planned as always. The morning starts when everyone is awake. Presents are opened one by one while the other family members watch and enjoy the various levels of excitement. It usually lasts until 11:00a. Then the dinner preparations start: with turkey and all the fixins. The day is spent at home having some quality time with family. Then the next day we go visit all the other family members and enjoy Christmas with them. I really like the way we do Christmas in our home. It's quieter, and more wholesome than travelling around every where to see the 5 sets of grandparents the kids have. It's weird not seeing my mom on Christmas as that was our tradition before kids, but it's more important to us that our kids spend Christmas at home and not travelling.

The Living Room

The living room is next on the list. Craftymama wants to tackle it this weekend. I'm nervous. Big projects like that overwhelm me - mostly the "where are all the things going" aspect. I need to be walked through it a little, otherwise I just collapse in a pile of overwhelmdness and can't function. There are built in book shelves covered with books, where are they going? All the furniture, all the everything.

We are lucky we don't need to live in the living room. The dining room is big enough to function as a sitting room, so we can just close the french doors to the living room and not worry about people touching the walls.

We are doing the living room the same colour as the dining room so they will flow into each other. Right now it is a blood red which suits the gothic type nature of the room, or the colour just makes it look gothic - who knows? So it will be interesting to see it cream coloured. It will be much brighter and seem bigger which will be a great thing for us since the house seems quite a bit smaller than the green house.

But how do I get passed my feelings of how to do it. I can help tape, and prime and maybe paint - but the moving of stuff out and around just frightens the bejeezes out of me.

I may have pictures soon!

We painted the dining room this weekend. And I say "we" because I actually helped this time. I had been taking a back seat to reno's for numerous reasons, but craftymama convinced me that I needed to and had to help and give it a try. So I helped tape and did the primer. (Though the primer had to be fixed and touched up by her - I'm not the best at even coverage lol). Then she painted. It was kind of fun - now if only I could get it even.

Craftymama took before, during, and will take after pictures of this project so I can start posting them here soon. I'm hoping to eventually get pictures up of the whole house so people can see it in all its glory. Well, it will be in all its glory once we finish it. The kitchen and bathroom need the biggest do over.

Next on the list is glassman's room, and that's going to be a bigger project as we need to remove paneling, put in installation and then drywall, on top of taking out the floors, and walls - and then sanding them, and then finally painting them. There are also closet doors that need to be replaced, and some paneling that is missing that we have to find somewhere in the giant mess of construction remnants sitting in our garage.

After that - who knows - hopefully the kitchen. But with the roof, and the boiler, and the van, and Christmas, money is a little bit tight and all these cosmetic things cost a pretty penny.

But - some pictures soon! I promise!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

So Glassman is moving out :(

He says he can't afford to live with us anymore, and I believe him, even though nothing has changed financially wise in the past year and he could afford it last year. I am sad. I am sad for many reasons...

1) the girls will only see him every other weekend. They are used to seeing him everyday. The boys wont see him at all, well maybe a little, but hardly. I am sad for my kids. Not sad that they will grow up in two houses, but sad at the change they have to go through. They will adapt as they are resilient, but I wish they didn't have to at all.

2) Through this I have realized that I have lost my good friend. I thought glassman and I had each other's backs still, but I guess we don't. I guess we each have to look out for our selves.

3) I'll miss him.

4) I'll miss, the house will miss, and craftymama will miss his extra income into the place. We are worried about finances, but what can you do but make it work.

So many reasons to be upset. There are reasons to be angry too, but I won't get into those as dwelling is not helpful and I am trying to let the anger go.

So, with the move comes bedroom changes. We will upgrade glassman's room with floor, ceiling, and wall removal/painting and move the boys into there. Then we will move into the boys' old room. Our current room downstairs will be turned into a playroom for the kids which we think they will love. It really will make a cute little playroom, I'm excited for that - but getting there will take some time and effort and money...which we don't have an abundance of because....

Our ceiling started leaking. Which means are roof needs repair or replacing. Fun times. Who has $8000 sitting around for a new roof? We certainly don't. We can't even borrow against our mortgage because we haven't even owned the house for a year yet. *sigh* owning a house is hard. But at least the roof will stop leaking and we can move the pot from our dining room floor soon....

Jump Around

We jump around from project to project don't we?

The boy's floor is almost done, the airlock chamber is almost done, and then craftymama got excited about the yellow room (this little non room off the kitchen) and we have bought a desk for it, refurbished a chair for the desk, and found a comfy chair to sit in in the corner. Craftymama now feels the urge to paint the room. One thing at a time!

But that's not the way we do things...ha ha ha

M is all but potty trained during the day now! Which makes taking him to school less nerve wracking now. It's a relief to not have to go through so many pairs of pants. I would say I'm proud of him, and I am to an extent, but he was potty trained before and then just stopped. So I guess I more expect him to be there now. I am happy for him, elated, but idk - I found myself getting quite frustrated near the end.

Just like I'm frustrated with LittleR going into Glassman's room every night. She does it from the nights I wasn't there and she was just told to go see daddy. Now it's a nightly thing, and because he doesn't wake up, she gets to sleep there all night. I suppose it's not a bad thing - it's just frustrating.

My motivation at work is still really low. It's like I need some sort of boost. I'm hoping when this guy Mark comes over to take over a lot of the marketing that I will focus more on the day to day stuff and won't be stressing over marketing like I am now. Maybe then, without the stress, I'll be able to focus and concentrate more as I will have an actual job description and what not. Here's hoping anyways.

Renoing our lives

The boys' room has had its floor removed and half painted! Yay, we really need to find some matching beds for them now. We are looking for some vintagy ones we can paint to match their room kind of like we did with K's.

Also, Craftymama built a bench (with power tools cause she's a Boss with them now), in the airlock chamber (what we call the front room). It looks great. It's set back in what used to be a closet and there is this cool beaming on the walls behind (I'm sure there is a word for it, but heck if I know what it is). Our house really is making progress.

But in all this progress there is a lot of mess. Our garage is full of construction debris. Got Junk is coming on Thursday to give us a quote and if it's a good one we will be dealing with it right then. I'm hopeful the quote isn't too high.

Kids started school today, or two of them did. K starts tomorrow. It's crazy not to be involved and not to be there. It still makes me upset and feel like a bad mom for not being there with all of them to guide them through this process. I still hate not being at home, and miss it terribly. I don't hate my work (though I heartily dislike it at times), I would much prefer to be at home. I can't help but thing though that there is no way I could do it like Craftymama does. She is amazing. She manages to work, go to school, and take wonderful care of our kids and herself. I am envious of her. But I also know she is envious of me for other reasons.

Craftymama and I have the most exciting news to share - but we can't yet.

Fixing and Freezing

So the boys' room is being done now. I have given up control of it as I am never home to do it. So Craftymama is doing it with my input. I'm so lucky to have someone like her home. She is really into the reno's and without her we wouldn't have gotten this much done. So far she has taken out a closet, removed ceiling panels, scraped the bead board, primed and painted the ceiling, and primed and painted the walls. My job: cleanup lol, and in doing so I stepped on an old rusty nail and got it lodged 2" or so in my foot. Hello tetanus shot. It hurt.

After the boys' room we are going to be doing the bathroom. *deep breath* (for me anyways). It really needs a facelift...actually a whole body lift. We are moving all the fixtures to the right, getting a new vanity and bathtub, tiling the floor, replacing the subfloor, and painting. My boss at work is willing to help us out financially (bless him), and has recommended a guy that can help us to the installs, plumbing, and floors. So hopefully, this doesn't end up costing us an arm and a leg. I know it will though.

It's getting colder, and with our old house we definitely feel it early. We still sleep with blankets on, and sometimes the temperature requires my warm fuzzy pants. I know we will have to turn the boiler on before I normally like to, but I'm holding out as long as possible.