Craftymama and I had a conversation the other day about how I view her parenting of K and LittleR. I guess I am protective. Further, I have always compared her love for the boys to my love for the girls. Hers is so deep and unconditional...me..I don't get as excited about pictures and random flowers. I don't have that same pull or whatever to my bio kids as she does. As a result, I always thought and felt that she was harder on the girls and that she obviously favoured them. I never thought for even a second that she didn't love the girls, I knew she did, but I questioned whether she showed it enough for them to know it.
Since that conversation I have been forcing myself to look at not the differences between how she parents the kids but instead just focus on how she shows her love for the girls. I have been amazed at the things I was missing. I was caught off guard by the little things I hadn't seen before. How when LittleR went for a sleepover as soon as Craftymama saw her she demanded a hug and picked her right up.
I am elated to see these relationships developing, and even more elated that I have opened my mind and heart up to that possibility. It's so awesome that these kids have so many parents who can express their love in a variety of ways. I think what we all have to be careful of though is each of their insecurities. I know I have to be extra careful with R to sit down with him, on his level, and look him in the eye. He doesn't give eye contact very often, but its important for us to develop trust. With K, I know we have to be careful with our words - things like leaving her behind when she is going too slowly, or someone put a bug in her stomach really stick with her. With so many different influences there are so many more opportunities to mess them up ha ha ha.
Regardless, relationships are blossoming - and its beautiful to watch.
No comments:
Post a Comment